I wake once more to the light of a new day. As I shake off the cobwebs left by another peaceful night’s slumber, I have no choice but to smile. I am by myself in my quiet morning world, but by no means am I alone. My companion this day and all days prior is all around me and within my very soul. With each new day of courageous perseverance and clarity of the mind, she gains a stronger hold on my security, sanity, and peace of mind.
Times have not always been this relaxed and carefree however. My life’s journey thus far has had great triumphs, but has also been plagued with very dark and disturbing travels through worlds of hurt and despair. Whether self inflicted or brought by the hands of others I have felt true anguish. This wretched affliction is not abolished from my current reality now, but merely lies dormant waiting for my divine protector to lose her grasp on my safety in a momentary lapse of concentration.
This ethereal energy that surrounds me and keeps me sheltered from the bombardment of temptation and the trickery of tragedy is unwavering in her vigilance. It must surely be an exhausting task to look after someone such as myself. Most certainly my past indiscretions, the playing of dangerous games, and my countless dances with the DEVIL have left her battle weary and burdened.
This day my heart is rich and my spirit is light, but I must always be mindful of the fact that the dark realities of my compulsions, addictions, and deadly desires lie in wait to be the ruination of my very soul. My Guardian Angel protects me, but I must also lessen her strain by acknowledging my weaknesses and taking avoidance of the most obvious perils that remain to see me fall again. This much I owe to the one who keeps guard of my remaining sanity and protects me from myself.
The depths of gratitude I feel for this unseen entity are immense and immeasurable. The debt I owe I can never repay. For without the divine intervention of my devoted defender, I most assuredly would have encountered a fate worse than death.
I am happy today and my thoughts turn to hope. The hope that I will be accompanied by this true warrior spirit for the rest of my days. I want to feel her watchful eyes upon me until my proper time has come and I am peacefully carried off to the kingdom of light and love.
As a young and growing child Mental seeds were sown He’s medicated to be mild Side effects unknown
Said to be unmanageable
Too wild to control
Prescriptions all too viable
No care for future toll
Now this child gentle, meek Falls victim to their taunts Mistake this boy as being weak He flees to sheltered haunts
Witness of horrendous things Of which he will not speak How can family, terror bring His loved ones, havoc wreak
He finds his shelter safe and warm He climbs inside his mind His sanctuary from the storm His thoughts help time unwind
As he grows and comes of age He grows tired of his pills Things to do and wars to wage Newfound battle of the wills
He’s grown and reached maturity After years mis-diagnosed A dangerous threat to humanity For no longer is he dosed
Now his head is free to think Unclouded by that haze of mellow To evil thoughts his focus sinks For vengeance new voices bellow
His problem is with reality Cruel twisting of his fate It is Preying on his sanity Ever filling him with hate
All those years of passive sedation The malice that was endured Now he realizes with exultation His revenge can be secured
Unnoticeable from the outside The rage within his head A wicked smile, eyes open wide The madman kills to see you dead
Horrific spree of death and hate This killer caught and sent away Caged like an animal to meet his fate Asylum his home ’til end of days.
Far too dangerous to himself and the rest He must be tranquilized, to take away the wild A remedy concocted, one that seems the best The same one it happens, he was given as a child
The anger and fury lose their grip on his mind The memories of his childhood friend held close Taken back to better days, now easier to find Then five words bring clarity, “it’s time…..increase the dose”
Life and death cross paths as they wind And all things are bound to repeat Locked away in cage and mind The circle is complete